One of the Biggest reasons for wanting to re-vamp my life is that I'm kind of going through this internal clock ticking phase and I know that I really want to have children and with that the whole husband, house and good life scenario. Through that I have been feeling this impending doom that I'm just not going to make it. That I'm not attractive or witty or Whatever it takes to find someone who wants to commit the rest of there life too me. Much less In a position to bring children into this world.
I know that Im not grossly overweight and right now I stand on the edge of healthy and not but I've been unhealthy In fact I was sick for four years running. My Idea is that you wouldn't take rotting produce to the farmers market and expect some passer by to want to buy it, so you cant expect to find someone who will be happy with you if you aren't happy with yourself.
Furthermore if I cant succeed in becoming a better version of myself I have see pieces of my future, and they are bleak. My mother ( the most loving and wonderful person that a girl has the honor to call hers) has been overweight and unhealthy my whole life from asthma to fatigue I've witnessed her sitting out while we enjoyed actives with our dad that she couldn’t participate in.
Just to be clear I'm not only talking about my weight or my health there are things that I see in myself that I want to remove before I start teaching them to my children. Some of them I learned from my parents and some I just picked up along the way. Maybe I have an Idealized version of what kind of spouse and parent I want to be, however it is my theory that if you don’t reach for the moon you will never touch the stars. One of my biggest qualms with my mother is that she is unmovable, unchangeable. She has even told me herself that she is old and set in her ways and she doesn't plan on changing. (This is simplifying the situation because she is working on changing her health and weight at this moment) What I'm trying to say is that I have this problem you tell me to do something and I get frustrated because I had already had the idea and I wanted it to be my own not something that you feel like you gave to me. Or if I'm doing something one way and a better way is suggested I will mostly likely stick with my way because I'm stubborn. This is so unattractive in me, and I want to change it along with a collection of other things that I feel are hindering me from having the life I desire.
I plan on sitting down and making the list and working on one thing at a time (maybe two) but the catalyst
For this whole thing was EASTER dresses. I was kind of feeling unattractive and decided that I should buy a new dress for Easter and that would help me feel more pretty on Sunday and boost my moral. It had the opposite affect what I realized when trying on a number of dresses that clung to my curves, was that changing what I put on top wasn’t going to change the fact that I was feeling unattractive. That I had the choice to be ok with way I looked and felt and on a broader spectrum with being mediocre, just barley making it, halfway in the game, feeling ok but not great, OR I could make the decision to CHANGE.
So the very first thing on my list is my Personal Appearance: including but not limited to: weight, health, style, personal maintenance , and self worth (because what's the point of changing yourself if your never going to realize how special you are in the first place)
Wow Girl that’s a Lofty Goal So how you going to do all that?
Step by Step:
The first thing I did was Buy a book (with knowledge comes power) I bought this book the 4-Hour Body by Timothy Ferriss that I heard about as I was listing to Rachel Ray while editing photos. I don’t want to go into a lot of detail about the book because you can find that info yourself (http://www.fourhourbody.com/) However the man happens to be a brilliant insight and his suggestions make since, its based on science but also includes humor and practical examinations of others lives and how they are changing. The book is mostly about changing your physical body which is why I chose it for my first Goal but I feel like a lot of the ideas can transcend into other areas of my life. He even talks about how having a Easter Dress moment or what he calls a Harajuku moment to show you that you have a reason for action one that will stick with you and cause results. Another thing discussed is insuring that you will stick with the changes. Which is why we are here telling you step by step what little (or in this case 227.5lbs) ole me is doing in her life to change. So in my new little blog here I will be sharing photos and stories about what I'm eating how I'm excising and most importantly what my weight is and how its changing. Along with the other steps I'm taking to improve my life.
I will be starting My Diet on Monday May 9th but rather than sitting around and waiting for that. I wanted to take a few days to access the starting point.
Currently I am 5'8 and weigh 226.5 pounds ( apparently I had a pound of pee)
My measurements are:
Upper arms (taken 5 inches from elbow) L: 13 2/8 R: 14
Waist (Taken at belly button): 43 1/8
Hips (taken 3 inches down from bellybutton) 47 5/8
Thighs (taken 8 inches from top of knee): L: 24 1/8 R: 23 2/8 I realize that that is almost an inch difference but oddly I knew that I have torn ligaments in my left ankle and tend to favor my right leg.
Total Ti: 165 3/8
I am also measuring my bust because I would love for that to change
Bust: 45 3/8
To keep myself Honest I will be posting weekly weights and Pictures: Here is where I started.
Furthermore I want to see what I'm actually eating so I will be posting pictures of everything I eat from now until two weeks from my starting date: I just know your so excited.
As a further catalyst of making some small changes that will make me feel better about the bigger ones coming I am going to go get my hair cut its something I did in college when I felt stuck and just needed a new start.
A few more things you might need to know before we get started:
I am 28 years Old
I have Celiacs disease which I will discuss more when we get to talking about food, I felt it was a bit much to include all of that in the beginning days (remember I was sick for 4 years here is the culprit) If you want to know more right now here's a quick wiki link: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Coeliac_disease
I am a photographer who is interested in a million different things.
Please Feel free to comment Even if your going to Tell me I'm fat and shouldn’t post pictures on the Internet Because Honey I plan on proving you WRONG. I welcome you all to this journey of mine whether you be my Encouragers or my Hecklers.
“Man's main task in life is to give birth to himself, to become what he potentially is. The most important product of his effort is his own personality.” --- Erich Fromm
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